GROTESQUE

Just about every aspect of this government. Party gate, energy prices, rising taxes, water pollution, climate change, trade with neighbours, Northern Ireland, Metropolitan Police, fishing policies, agricultural support, honesty, prudence, economic control, tax hikes, billionaire profits, and even Sunderland AFC are doing badly!

Caribbean rum cake

This Caribbean rum cake recipe is written by Caribbean chef, Keshia Sakarah. Keshia says: “Black cake is a rich, luxurious and traditional dessert made at Christmas. Originally called the empire Christmas pudding, this cake is an evolution of the British plum and Christmas puddings. It’s a clear reference to the British colonial interests in the Caribbean as it’s found mostly on islands of the former British West Indies – for example, Barbados, Montserrat and Guyana, following the introduction of Christianity during which new religious holidays and practices were observed.

“Dried fruit, a range of spices, rum, sugar and molasses were all high-value trade items during the colonial period that have remained key components of this recipe. The ritualistic process of soaking fruits in alcohol then grinding into a rough paste, which can start as early as the Christmas before, is key to maintaining the cake’s richness and density.”

FRUIT BASE

  • dried prunes 50g
  • sultanas 65g
  • glacé cherries 25g
  • raisins 50g
  • mixed peel 35g
  • cinnamon 2 sticks
  • spiced rum 150ml

CAKE BASE

  • unsalted butter 225g, plus extra for the tin
  • dark brown muscovado sugar 225g
  • eggs 5
  • vanilla extract 1 tsp
  • almond extract 1 tsp
  • lemon 1, zested
  • orange 1, zested
  • plain flour 150g
  • ground almonds 25g
  • baking powder 1 tsp

BROWNING

  • molasses syrup or sugar 45ml
  • spiced rum 45ml

SOAKING

  • spiced rum 100ml

Method

  • STEP 1For the fruit base, put the prunes, sultanas, cherries, raisins, mixed peel and cinnamon sticks into a bowl. Pour over the spiced rum then mix together well, ensuring the fruit is coated. Put in an airtight jar or container and leave to soak for at least 48 hours or as early as a month in advance. Once the fruits have soaked (they will have absorbed the rum), discard the cinnamon sticks and pour the rest into a blender or food processor and whizz until about three-quarters smooth (you want to keep some texture in the fruit).
  • STEP 2Heat the oven to 180C/fan 160C/gas 4. Butter and line a 20cm springform cake tin with baking paper. To make the cake base, cream together the butter and sugar in a large bowl until light and fluffy. In a separate bowl, 
  • whisk the eggs, vanilla and almond extracts, and citrus zests until combined. Gradually pour the egg mixture into the creamed butter and sugar, a little at a time, whisking lightly so you don’t knock out the air. It may curdle a little but that’s okay. Sift the flour and baking powder into the mixture along with the ground almonds. Gradually fold in using a metal spoon, to retain the air. Add the blended fruit mixture and fold in until evenly combined, then set aside.
  • STEP 3For the browning, put the molasses and spiced rum in a small pan and bring to a low boil. Turn down the heat and cook for 2-3 minutes or until syrupy and reduced by a third. Quickly pour into the cake mixture. Mix well to ensure the browning is distributed throughout.
  • STEP 4Pour the mixture into the prepared tin, then use a knife to level the top and ensure the mixture sits evenly in the tin. Bake for 1 hour 10 minutes-1 hour 20 minutes or until the cake is an even dark brown colour across the 
  • top and a knife or skewer comes out clean when inserted into the centre. Put the cake on a wire rack to cool.
  • STEP 5Now the cake is ready to be fed. Once the cake has cooled, remove the cake from the tin (keep the baking paper intact), put on a plate or tray then, using a skewer, poke holes across the surface of the cake. Pour the rum over the surface of the cake gradually, focussing on the areas that have been poked with the skewer to ensure the rum reaches the bottom of the cake. Feel free to add as much rum as you like when feeding the cake – the more you add the stronger the flavour will be over time. Now it is ready to serve.

A Parish recipe

A cake – butter 175g, 225g caster sugar.2 eggs, plain flour 250g. ,baking powder, dried fruit (pineapple and coconut). soaked in alcohol – rum? lemon juice, cinnamon, all spice, nutmeg. To be modified!

PATHETIC

Attempts to deflect attention to Starmer over the lack of prosecution of Jimmy Saville in 2009 – something that may not have even been his decision – is pathetic. Dorries interview was beyond pathetic. I am surprised Johnson has not got the Met Police checking speed cameras for the last 30 years to see if Starmer ever broke the speed limit.

TRANSFER DEADLINE

Everton confirm Frank Lampard – he was not bad at Chelsea so we will see how he goes. Nice children’s books. Everton have been going down the pan recently, but have some excellent players, and possibly a good signing in Danny van Der Beek. Aston Villa seem to have made some good signings. Newcastle are hoping their signings will save their bacon. Lots of other rumours – Mbappi to Real Madrid (confirmed on twitter) ? Then the other big potential signings – Haaland – I suspect someone has sorted out a summer transfer.

POLICE – BURGLARY

and Geography! Police numbers have been reduced and paperwork increased. Why not employ retired people to interrogate the data produced on burglaries and similar crimes. Even simple mapping would help the rest of us take precautions. And yes I have read Richard Osman’s books! Why not?

EU REGULATIONS

It is proper that the government looks at all the regulations we have adopted from the EU. However Johnson had a verbal shit storm and came up with a figure of £1 billion. We know where the figure comes from – his fetid imagination. Most of the laws were promoted and voted for by the UK.